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Author: C. L. Harmon

Loss Is A Gain We Cannot Afford To Lose

We are these amazing creatures with passions, secrets, knowledge, and wisdom caught up in this essence of life, the only reality familiar to us. We learn to love and then must learn to accept that we lose it. We trust that goodness always prevails and yet ultimately discover that evil often wins the day. We must learn to control anger and violence when we feel passionate that it is warranted. We must learn to forgive when it is not deserved. We are compelled to build and create fully aware that destruction is inevitable. And we must learn and do all of these in order to grow.

We can survive without learning any of these expectations which are laid at our feet. We can prosper through evil deeds and achieve monetary trophies and titles, but we will never grow into anyone who truly appreciates the life which is given to us if we do not choose to accept what is difficult. Growth has always been the gift. It is the metamorphosis which defines the real meaning of free will and the reason for which it was given.

We never become any more than the years of our age without the choice to accept the growth which only comes through our willingness to accept the suffering which makes it possible. Your choice to accept and to learn is your reward. Everything worthwhile and lasting is only gained through loss and suffering. Without this knowledge, we will never comprehend the value of anything. What makes us so amazing is not only our ability to gain through loss but our choice to willingly accept a loss with only the belief that we gain.

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What Lies Within

A sculptor looks at a piece of granite or stone with either a belief that there is a work of art within that stone that he will uncover. Or he looks at it with the belief that he will create a work of art from where there was none before.Although the creation may be the same in appearance as each artisan finishes toiling with the stone, the sculptures are very different to the sculptors. The artisan who uncovers what is hidden learns that he can see beyond what is on the surface.

He can chisel each sliver of stone to discover that beauty and creation are all around us if we choose to remove those layers which obscure them. He begins to understand that all things have depth and if we do not seek to uncover what lies beneath then we lose what has been hidden for us to find.

The artisan who creates from within to bring about something new understands that the origins of creations are mysteries locked up inside of us. He learns that the surface of the stone is an opportunity to carve, chip and then breathe life into a new creation.

But it is the artisans themselves who learn above all that they are simply a stone for another Creator. One who has hidden beauty and mystery within them awaiting discovery. Through our visions, toils, and patience, we all create and unearth the mysteries in our daily lives only to realize we were always the greatest works of art in the universe.

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Mindset: Patterns Are Us

C.L. Harmon

There have always been patterns in life that most never give a second thought. For those who do, they only see enough to know there are such patters and not the reasoning behind them. We even classify these patterns in terms such as love languages, personality types, body types, attitude dispositions, among many others.

But why are we given patterns when each of us is created to be unique? Perhaps it so we never feel alone. In a creation where each is unique, it stands to reason that we would often feel alone with no guides, teachers or examples to follow because of our individuality.  But with our natural inclination to recognize and be drawn to what feels familiar, we are given the opportunity to learn from those before us who are in the same patterns we are.

Within this incredible existence we inhabit, we are all guides to others. When we experience loss, tragedy, heartbreak or any other suffering, we are given a light in the darkness that is built into our psyches. If we are weak in our faith and stumbling through misery and confusion, our Creator still gives us a map to bring us direction through our desires to identify with others who are familiar to us through these patterns.

As unique as we are and as lost as we can become, we are never left alone. We are all each other’s keepers and teachers. Our experiences are the messages of comfort we offer others who are wayward. What an incredible design that we are a part of. If patterns prove nothing else, they prove we are connected and instrumental in the cohesion that which connects an entirely unique creation into the purpose that we are actually one with eachother.

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Happiness Is A Journey

C.L. Harmon

Happiness is not a choice but a journey. We tend to believe that choices dictate the outcomes of our lives. This is only true to a point. Certainly, there is the cause and effect. But this is only a teacher to help us along as we travel on this journey.

We must learn to love. Then we must learn how to lose that love. Everyone experiences this at least once in their lives. We must learn how to accept that loss and to accept that we must live without it. We must come to the understanding that moving forward opens up new opportunities for us. We cannot simply state that we are happy despite the loss, pain, and misery. We must travel through it and gain insight from the experience.

With each loss, failure, and setback, we are expected to soldier on by our Creator. But more than this, we are required to grow out of the ashes into someone who can open up again knowing the pain of a broken heart or a shattered dream. We must learn to count our blessings knowing even this does not bring instant happiness in the wake of a tragedy.

The key to happiness is gaining the wisdom to understand that learning how to be happy is a journey. We must learn to forgive those who wrong us because what we hold onto, holds onto us. If we do not learn to forgive, then we must suffer the pain of that trespass each day. This is not a wisdom that can be gained without experience. It is, however, knowledge, that can be shared to enlighten us when we finally choose to release the negative we are grasping.

Happiness is not a product we purchase. It is not a word or a gesture or even a belief that can erase that which causes us sadness and depression. It is a journey where we learn patience, acceptance, forgiveness, empathy, and kindness. Life’s experiences culminate in this wisdom which teaches us that without our choice to learn these lessons, we are choosing not to be happy.

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Mindset: The “Tryangle” Of Life

It is such a simple question. What is our purpose here? The age-old inquiry as to why we are here. Why were we created? We are all different and yet the same, together but apart and yet inexplicably connected in ways we can’t understand. We share so much with each other and though we may never meet others, we still understand that we are a part of them in the cosmic sense.

Theologians, philosopher, and poets have pondered the meaning of life as do each of us during trying times in our lives with struggles and loss. Some believe that perhaps the answer is what we take from our experiences, lessons that become knowledge and wisdom. Perhaps there is merit in this concept. Or maybe those are simply a result of actions we experience in life.

What if the answer was far more simple than that? What if the experiences were not lessons but opportunities? There are concepts in this realm of existence that are available to every one of us. They do not discriminate, cost currency or die. Each of us has the opportunity to feel and give love, hope, and faith. The three concepts that no one can take from us.

We can choose to love even if we feel others may not love us. It is ours accept and to give without restriction and is infinite. Hope is ours as long as we hold onto it. Others may attempt to take it, but they are powerless to do so if we refuse to relinquish it. Faith is the elixir of life. It is not forced upon us nor can we force it upon others. We can choose to believe that there is a Creator who loves and guides us to a meaningful existence. We are free to trust in that greater power just as we are free to believe in those in whom we share the world. Our faith in others is also a choice for us to make. And when we choose to believe in others. We give them hope, we show them love and we give them the ability to believe in others.

Perhaps the meaning of life is to never understand how and why good and bad happen, but opportunities to understand who we can become by finding the meaning and power in love, hope, and faith.

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Mindset: Free Will Is A Choice

The concept of free will is simple in its definition, but baffling to many of us since the choices we make do not always lead us to the outcomes for which we hoped and believed. How is it that some make choices to pursue specific goals and make similar choices as others to attain those goals, but do not the achieve the goals while others do.

I believe this is because of the choices we make with the actual freewill we are given. One of the greatest gifts we can give our Creator, who gave us free will, is to trust him so much that we give it back to Him. This action tells Him that we believe so much that His choices for us will be greater than any we could have chosen for ourselves.

However, as a result of this, we are led on a journey that is often blind and appears to make no sense. Others who choose to keep their free will and guide themselves often do reach their goals, but will not attain the greater gifts and understanding in this life He had set aside for them.

It is our choice to trust in our Creator or to only trust in ourselves. This is true free will. However, we cannot serve ourselves and the Creator too. Perhaps the greatest gift He gave us was the opportunity to give our destinies back to him, instead of leaving us to battle the world without His guidance.

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Mindset: Happiness Is A State Of Acceptance

It’s often said that we are responsible for our own happiness and that we simply choose our internal strength and will of mind to help us find comfort and joy. I don’t believe this to be completely accurate.
Although I do believe that we are responsible for our own happiness to a degree and that choice is a contributing factor in our happiness, I also believe that others play a key role in how we feel as well.
Human beings were not created to be alone or to exist in solitude. We are created to learn, live and love with others. Though it is true that we experience love from our Creator, it is only through others that we can experience intimate love with another, trusting love with a friend or the pure love that is raising a child.
Each one of these types of loves brings happiness and a sense of joy that is unmatched anywhere else in creation. The absence of them will most certainly cause us to feel sadness, depression, and pain. We can only learn to accept this absence with grace and a belief that there is a purpose in that absence. But true happiness only comes through our connections to each other, our will to seek happiness and the choice to make them one.

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Mindset: Whispers In The Wind

So many actions we do, words we utter and situations in which we are part of are seemingly of no significance at the time which they occur. Often they are as a fleeting thought, gone almost as quickly as they came. But to someone, they have an impact. It may be one that we never even learn of, but someone was affected by that action, word or the situation that occurred.

It is as though a cosmic pulse is formed which travels far into the subconscious of creation itself and the consciousness of those within this creation. It knows not the bounds of time and space. It lives in memories, in bones, in soil and in decisions made by all of us from the onset of that action.

Would our choices matter more if we understand that each one is like an echo heard far beyond reaches we can’t even fathom? That they live in our hearts as hate or love, in our minds as prejudice and equality, in history as brutality or kindness in philosophy as dark or light and in eternity as peace or torment? One seemingly insignificant action can be one thread for someone to hold on to in desperation or one thread unraveled from a blanket of security.

Nothing in life is insignificant. Everything is whispers in the wind. No word, no action, no situation is without cause and effect. Understanding this is how the world changes, one word, one action, one situation at a time

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Mindset: Exit The Madness

The heart does not lie, judge or justify action. It only asks for that which it desires and then leads us to those yearnings without fear and apprehension while offering us no control over where it chooses to lead. It is our minds which must follow our hearts and our will which must make them do so. Reason can destroy our dreams and squash our desires if we follow the mind, which is capable of judgment and justification.

The world in which we inhabit is often corrupt and embroiled in confusion. We think about methods to survive the madness allowing our thought processes to guide us through the chaos. We believe reason can free us from what we can’t control.
But in doing so we allow the part of us, which is capable of judgment, justification and even deceit to make some of the most important decisions in our lives.

Do we truly want to make those decisions without the benefit of complete truth?
When we follow our hearts, we are led to places that fulfill us and we are never led astray. In fact, we are actually led out of the madness which consumes our thoughts and into the safety of true understanding and reasoning.

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Putting The Pieces Together

My mother once told me a story about a successful man from whom God took the use of his legs. I don’t remember all of the particulars but the gist of it was that the man had made choices in his life that led him to financial success. Apparently, God had other plans for him. Modern medicine could not find the cause of the man’s inability to walk and so the man writhed in bed from mental anguish as all he had worked for slipped away. He was helpless and in despair as nothing improved his situation. Depression set in and grew as weeks turned into months and the man became suicidal. Although not a religious woman, his wife called a priest to speak with her husband and talk him out of such thoughts.

While in the man’s bedroom, the priest noticed a very unusual carving on the dresser. He inquired as to its origin and the man said that he had carved it as a boy. He explained how he had loved to carve as a child, but his father had forced him to put away such childish hobbies as they were not a method in which to make a living. He had not carved any since. The priest, in awe of such a creation, persuaded the man to begin carving again as therapy. Miraculously the more he carved the more use of his legs he regained.

There are two ways one can interpret what happened to this man. One is that it was coincidental and the man would have regained the use of his legs anyway. Or, there is the one in which God took away the use of the man’s legs for not doing what He wanted this man to do. Since I don’t believe in coincidences, I shall focus on the second scenario where God took away the use of his legs.

I believe that we need to revisit a part of my last blog when I write about doing what God wants us to do, according to His plan for us. Perhaps the Biblical phrase “Thy Will Be Done” comes to mind here. God does not create a universe and not retain at least, a certain amount of control over it. The problem it seems is that others, especially those who love us, often do not understand the amount of control these desires which God gives us impacts our lives. Just as the man who lost the use of his legs, his father believed that working with carving was not what was best for his son. He was wrong.

Although the father’s intentions were good, they were not God’s intentions for the man. I believe that creative people struggle with this more than any other type of people. I think it’s a fair statement that most creative people struggle financially, often for long periods of time, while attempting to use their talent to make a living. It’s a very difficult road to take and one that is often very long before reaching the destination we desire. What we must all understand though is that we didn’t choose to be this way any more than a person chooses to have cancer or limited intelligence. It was given to us before we were born for a purpose that is not disclosed to us.

We are beholden to a desire we did not ask for. And yes we do have a choice to not pursue that desire as did the man who lost the use of his legs. It is doubtful to me that God goes to such drastic measures with all of His children who do not follow the desires given to them. But I do believe that He keeps a sense of happiness from them, a sense of fulfillment even. It is that happiness which we seek above all else. And so we are only content when we are pursuing those desires.

Walls that are constructed and broken bridges are not to keep us from those following our hearts and from reaching our desires; they are instructions informing us that we must turn and follow another direction to reach what we seek.  What others may see as failures or mistakes we have made, God knows to be directional logistics. We should always listen to others as God provides direction in many ways, but we should never follow the words of those who do not understand that God sets a course for us based in faith and not in logic.

That pursuit is our journey. The failures, the triumphs, the losses and the gains are all part of what our desire is to teach us. Remember always that it is not others who must understand what we are doing. What God desires for us is not a riddle for others to solve, it is a puzzle that we alone must assemble in order to discover the meaning of who we are meant to be.

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